A Slight Shift, A Subtle Change
The name, I Now Pronounce You, I am keeping. The look, as you can see, I am changing. I am who I am and the name I rather like….in it’s dark and ironic way, that is. The look, though…that’s my nod to the fact that things are different than they were when I started this.
As to what I shall be pronounced? We’ll see…
There are some other things that I’ll be changing as well. A different approach to this…I plan to continue writitng this as a log book to this new adventure. It also serves to make myself accountable (that word again ) by writing these things down in a public forum…I am forced to reevaluate and learn and say “OK, this is what I wanted, what have I done about it.”
And, what do I want?
I don’t want to be angry, but it seems as though I am. It comes and goes at bizarre times and is instigated by bizarre things. That which you would think would set me right off, actually kind of makes me laugh (did someone say picketers?) and the things that shouldn’t be a big deal? Those things piss me off. (FUCKING PLEASE MOVE OUT OF THE DOORWAY OF THE METRO)
I’d like to put together one of those 5 year plans for myself, since the one I had is (ahem) no longer relevant. I’d like to have a destination…before I got engaged my life’s dream was to open a bar for US and British ExPats in the South of Spain. For real…a Blues bar. (Like you didn’t see that coming) I could see it in my mind’s eye clear as day. Then it went away b/c I had new goals and a shared destination with exFiance that didn’t really work with that. I thought it would come back…that we’d split up and I’d go right back to wanting my “ExPAT America”. Surprisingly, that’s not the case. I’m curious as to what it’s going to turn out to be…
I want to see my family more.
I want to not get in to the same old BS with them that I normally seem to trip in to. It SEEMS to go something like this.
“You blame us for the fact that you’re not married, don’t you”
No, really I kind of thank you for that
“what’s that supposed to mean”
Nothing, Jesus…is it too early for me to make a drink?
You get the idea. I’d like to find a way around that and just say “You made mistakes, I made mistakes, but you’re still the only family I’m going to have so let’s just start from there…and have that drink”
That’s all I’ve got so far. It’s a start, and the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. (Led Zeppelin said that, yo…right?)
To that end, I saw the Nats play in Virginia Tech hats last night and I was moved…the Red Sox and Yankees play this weekend which is always cause for celebration, and there’s a hell of a party happening on Friday night. You haven’t heard? Oh it’s all the rage kids. Rage being used in both senses of the word, apparently.
I hope to see you all there. Yeah even you…and you…and yeah I guess you, too.