I Now Pronounce You

The World Series

Posted in Uncategorized by inowpronounceyou on October 24, 2007

Obviously, I’m less excited about the Series than I thought I was going to be, what with the Red Sox in it against the Rockies. The sting is still there, folks, believe me. However, unlike many fans I am a baseball fan first and a Yankees fan second. So, in keeping with that fact, I’m going to tell you how I see this series.

Oh, and if you know nothing about baseball and are dating a fan, I guarantee a few quotes form this post will get you the “WOW baby, where did THAT come from?!”

Now then;

Everyone is going to tell you that this series is going to come down to Boston’s superior pitching and hitting, and that’s that. I say bullshit. This Rockies team is better than people are giving them credit for, which is hard to believe when you’ve won 21/22 games but it’s true. The sad fact is that no one stayed up past their bed time to see how truly special this team is…

Consider the fact that the Rockies have an ERA of 2.8 (last time I checked) this postseason and in 22 games have given up just two unearned runs. Now consider the fact that the reason that the Sox were able to beat Cleveland at all was a pitching fade that was just short of shocking. All due respect Boston fans, it’s true. After game 4, the Indians just stopped playing. They stopped throwing strikes, started making stupid plays and bad decisions, and all but laid down for Boston. The Sox pitching was not that great outside of Beckett and one game by Schilling, and their bullpen is, well, not that bad ass, either. Throw in, for good measure, that Tim Wakefield won’t be pitching and John Lester will…

It ain’t the pitching that will make the difference.

So it’s the offense, right? Well, not so fast there, either. The Sox can certainly score with the best of them, having lead the league run differential. But the Rocks lead the NL in the same stat. Clearly, both teams can put up the numbers. But, let’s not forget that Ortiz can’t DH in Colorado, and the Rox pitchers don’t have to hit in Fenway. Consequently, those numbers should even out a bit as well…

And just to be sure that I’m letting it all hang out, let’s not forget that during the first half of the Season when the Red Sox looked to be running away with the AL East, the Rockies came to Fenway for 3 games of interleague play and absolutely beat the shit out of the Red Sox, 2 games to 1, with a combined score of 20-5.

So, I’m picking the Rockies, right?


Despite the fact that I think way too many writers are giving far too little credit to the little team that could from Colorado, I’m picking the Red Sox in 6. I have a very different reason, though.

In a word; Speed.

Yorvit Torrealba, catcher for the Rockies, has absolutely no gun. He’s zero threat to throw out anyone, let alone the speedy runners the Sox will have on base in Pedroia, Ellsbury, and Lugo, and Crisp. (should he ever get in to the game) They know it, the Red Sox know it, hell, everyone in baseball knows it. I look for the Sox to pressure the Rockies with a very NL style of play by stealing and executing hit and runs early and often and forcing the Rockies in to stressful pitching situation after stressful pitching situation.

It pains me to say it, but there’s going to be another trophy in Boston. I’m rooting like mad for Colorado to win and I can see, with a few breaks here and there, how they could actually pull it off…

But I wouldn’t bet the farm on it. God help me, the Sox win this in 6 games.


16 Responses to 'The World Series'

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  1. Baby Bien said,

    And I will be there in person tomorrow night. Go fucking Sox!!!!

  2. Bruce said,

    I’m on the same page with Sox in 6, it hurts though.

    Baby Bien…have fun. Going to the World Series is still one of the best experiences I have ever had. I can’t root for your team, but I can say that I am excited for you.

  3. ha..you said ortiz..and that made me think tito…and that made me think jenna jameson..soo..umm not even the WORLD F-ing SERIES..can break the hold that porn has on my brain..i may need rehab..

  4. startingtoday said,

    I grew up a Sox fan. It was just kind of hereditary; my dad had baseball on all the time during the summer. This is where I’m going to totally get slammed by other Sox fans – I rooted like crazy in 04 for the Sox – they hadn’t won in FOREVER, and it was SOOOO exciting. And then, they won. And I cried. And screamed. But now? The excitement is gone. It’s like stalking a guy that’s not available. You finally get him in bed, and then the excitement is over.

    And now? I’m really just looking forward to watching my Netflixed 28 Weeks Later tonight. I’ll probably flip back and forth.

    In some ways, it would be exciting if the Rockies won. New team, etc. Maybe I’m not as a big a Sox fan as I thought. I think I’m a fan of the underdog.

    Baby Bien – I’m envious. Being AT Fenway Park for the world serious could seriously sway who I choose to root for!

    Suicide Blond – I have never in my life heard someone who’s thoughts go from one thing to another so quickly (almost) randomly! (Except for myself of course!)

    Ok wow, that comment as a whole was a lot longer than I thought it would be!

  5. Arjewtino said,

    One thing you haven’didn’t mention was defense. The Rockies only made an NL-record low 68 errors this season, which is mind-boggling when you root for the Dodgers and saw them lay more boners than Jenna Jameson (nod to SB). Boston was second in the AL this year, making this series one of the (expected) best defensive series and, therefore, fluid and pure, in a long time (ahem, 2006 Tigers).

  6. Kiraa said,

    Don’t tell my boyfriend but I printed this so I can study it later.

  7. kate.d. said,

    i’m on my own for game one tonight, because my boyfriend has to work – who schedules a annual gala for the potential first game of the world series?? but whatever. he has reminded me about eight times today to send him text message score updates. i keep saying, “yes, i will remember. well, i will TRY to remember.”

    i get a little, um, wrapped up in it 🙂

  8. Eric said,

    Here’s the thing I think is significant, you mentioned it briefly, but the Red Sox lineup is awful in a National league park. They have 5 guys who can hit. The line up only works when Pedroia and Youkilis are getting on and Manny and Papi are driving them in. You sit Youkilis and you have to hit Lugo or Crisp (nearly automatic outs at this point) second, that throws the line up all out of wack (not to mention how bad the defense becomes with Ortiz at first). You sit Ortiz and you have Lowell following Manny with no protection behind them and that throws the whole line up out of wack. And with Drew, Varitek, Lugo/Crisp/Ellsbury, and the pitcher the bottom half of the line up is just a joke. What I’m saying is I can’t see how the Red Sox don’t get slaughtered in Colorado unless Dice K and the game 4 starter are lights out. The Rockies just need to figure out how to win one in Fenway.

  9. Baby Bien said,

    Except that Youk can play right field. So you just remove Drew from the line-up and problem is more than solved. Or they could be real crazy and put Youk at third (his natural position) and try Lowell at short, which removes Lugo’s terrible bat. Either way, there are more options for Tito than just removing Youk or Ortiz. Think outside the batter’s box. And in the end, 4 games at Fenway with the line-up their way gives the Sox the edge no matter what. Rockies fans better hope these kids are too dumb to know where they are or this series will be over fast.

  10. Baby Bien; lucky bastard

    Bruce; I will erect a little shrine to the Rockies if they can pull this off.

    Suicide Blonde; Somehow I feel like i should have seent hat coming.

    Startingtoday; I think you just got kicked out of the “nation”.

    Arjewtino; I did mention the 2 unearned runs in 22 games…but yes, the defense is staggering!

    Kiraa; for real? That’s so cool! Let me know how the cheat sheet goes!

    Kated; that timing SUCKS!!! Do try and remember to send him updates!

    Eric; I agree with everthing you’re saying, but I still think the Sox can run on them too freely. If the DON’T, Francona is an idiot.

    BB; HIs point is still the same; you lose all that protection and compromise your D. HAve you seen Colorado’s outfield? Manny is going to have enough trouble without sticking another liability out there.

  11. Justin said,

    The only speed Lugo demonstrates is back to the dugout after watching another called third strike.

    What a putz. And if it wasn’t for the series-ending catch, I’d have sooner seen Crisp fired. Bring back Ellis Burks, I say.

  12. WiB said,

    I just want to know how many times your hands cramped in protest while writing that post, especially the last line.

  13. janet said,

    hmmm, well tonight kinda sucked! here’s hoping for something better tomorrow…

  14. startingtoday said,

    Well, I think I might take back what I said about loving the underdogs and the excitement being over now that the Sox won in 04.. As soon as I started watching my Sox last night, the excitement started to grow! And thought it’ll never be as sweet as ’04, last night was pretty darn good.

    Yes, I know my Nation card is still revoked.

  15. Kiraa said,

    Okay, it didn’t work. He could tell I was bluffing. It probably doesn’t help that I was mostly drunk and already a bad liar.

    Maybe next time.

  16. kate.d. said,

    ellis burks! ha. blast from the past.

    my family back in boston are mainly ripshit that we’re stuck with j.d. drew (last week’s heroics notwithstanding). we’ll move coco to get ellsbury in the game next season mainly because we *can’t* move drew, right? at least that’s how it seems like it’ll shake out.

    not that coco has been such great shakes, but drew…eeeesh.

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